is it cool if i come over and use your computer?
what happened to yours?
i got a little to drunk last night and threw up on it...then i tried to wash it off under the sink.
i mistaked the back of her knee for her vagina
As far as classy things to do in front of your ex go, throwing up on your own shirt is not one of them.
yo dibs on the gosselin haired one.
This girl in my class is wearing a sweatshirt that says "LEAD ME NOT INTO TEMPTATION" ahaha I almost just laughed out loud. We could never be friends
Drunk man just did a hand stand, fell over, knocked over a whole table of desserts, and didnt lose his cowboy hat. winner.
I feel like a squirrel prepping for the winter on dollar beer nights.
To my wonderful winter break booty calls: thank you for making this holiday season enjoyable. I look forward to seeing you boys again this summer.
the only thing you and i have in common is the we like weed and looking at my naked body.
i could have been the DD. this is ridiculous. i'm the most sober and getting the least ass.
If you got tons of KY ads on HuluPlus, it's because I hit "relevant" every time.
Yeah,I'm just gonna keep fucking other guys til this idiot figures out he loves me.
Gave her a puke bucket just in case. She filled the bottom of it with tears. Super sad. Although I am super proud she didn't puke. That was a lot of Fireball.
The girl in the hotel room next to us walked out at the same time as me this morning. She just shook her head, looked at me and said, "faker." Is it that easy to tell?!??
The cop was standing next to me when I texted "haha" to your phone...didn't realize that he had taken it already...
Randomize
