I'm going to rape someone's good day.
I'm starting a business if you want to get involved
oh boy
Its called Cut N Tugs, haircuts with happy endings
his mom cheated on his dad so i think he has a weird freudian thing for whores
you kept thanking chef boyardee for having pull tab cans
Remember that time we became friends because I shotgunned a Tall Boy in your bathroom?
Those memories are both hazy and awesome.
Last night you sang a duet with a gay man posing as a straight man posing as nicole kidman; your life lacks neither color nor texture:)
You asked me if you had to go downstairs to get upstairs. And then you forgot where you were.
I just blew my weed a kiss
he cock-blocks himself, don't try to make excuses for him!
You wouldn't believe how many pro-life stickers, and "show us your tits" signs there are between here and Dallas.
He finally delivered on the dick pic, and Jesus Christ, it was worth the wait.
Marrying her is the worst scenario of any. That includes death and zombies.
Do not try to steal a picnic table from a park, all you will end up with are sore arms and broken dreams.
I impressed him by taking off my panties without removing my pants.
I can't really feel a difference, so essentially I paid 60 bucks to bedazzle my vag.
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