girl in the front row yawned. double jointed jaw. i know where i'll be sitting next class
So yes, he's hot, a scorpio, an artist and a perfect cock. I think my bi train just arrived in gay town.
please promise me that no matter what happens you will keep me away from the children
As a jewish boy dating her she thinks everypart of christmas is my first time. Helllllo bj under mistletoe!!
The thing is that despite the high paying career and the increased responsibility, my life hasn't changed that much. Only instead of blacking out on $2 wells at some dive I blackout on top shelf martinis in a suit. Oh and only on Fri & Sat nights. Being 30 doesn't suck as bad as everyone led me to believe.
I even got my dealer to make gluten free special cookies ;-)
well I woke up with about $3 in odd change and a note that said "I'm borrowing your weed." So, no, it didn't go to well.
Her instagram is literally selfies, cats, and guys she's fucked.
i think the realest test of our friendship is how hot your sister looks right now
Yeah, I've hit on priests at bars, too. Such a shame, there are a lot of hot men out there who've devoted themselves and their glorious genitalia to the Lord -_-
Because I'm currently dying, lacking waffles, and vaguely convinced I'm an eagle
You poured a bottle of water into the salad bowl and said "bowls are a joke" and then poured it into your lap.
Got a $290 noise violation last night for shouting "THE KING OF THE NORTH" til 2 am
Did you really kidnap my goldfish last night?
We ran out of vodka, so instead of body shots you wanted to do cupcake shots off her naked body...happy birthday to you.
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