I'm driving in the middle of nowhere, and I just saw a stuffed Barney hanging from a noose on a tree. Maybe I should turn around.
FIrst one done
How did it go?
I dunno I taled about women being treated wrong and quoted Ice T. So probably a "c"
so we were having anal, both very very drunk when he started shouting his roomates name
He bought me a burrito. I introduced him as "Horse-Dicked Jake" all night. My debt has been repaid.
I was just at home taking Vicodin for a week straight. Talk about a vacation.
Your brother's naked in the courtyard again. Just a head's up.
He said he's in to distance fucking. I thought he just mean long durations. We fucked on a towel all the way down his tile hallway accross his kitchen and into the living room
Thursday is not a good day to become a felon... It's bingo night
With great boredom comes great irresponsibility.
Please tell me you're not on their roof again..
i got woken up by a cockroach crawling onto my hand and now i'm pretty sure i'll never be clean again
My disney ticket is covered in lube, do you think they will accept it?
at this point I think you're judging my taste in men
I swear I'm not
It's okay, I'm judging my taste in men
In the last 2 hours I managed to have romantic starlit sex on the beach as the tide came in with not only just a gorgeous man, but one who happens to be Eastern European and finishing Harvard law school.
Oh wow. I want to be you right now.
I mean there are real risks associated with having unprotected sex, but I don’t think I need to worry about a ghost possessing me and having unprotected sex while using my body
What do you mean relationship? He paid for my tires and I gave him a blow job.
Randomize