We're like a lot better than the average bears
I feel odd... a had sex with a chick and she keept her socks on...
Even my Mr Clean Magic Eraser can't make last night disappear.
I know you didn't add your TWO random hook ups from the weekend to your FB friends AND change your status to "Good Catholic Girl" on the same day.
So i literally just wrote sorry on my quiz and turned it in.
she visited to give me a bj between clients. Social work at its finest.
Drunk life lesson just learned the hard way: do not try to play hump the great dane. He may take you up on it.
Sorry about all of the penis things that happened last night.
I ate an entire popcorn ball before bed. I know that because there is popcorn stuck to my poncho. Also. I'm still drunk. Also. I made out with a 19 year old. Also. #barnparties
Last night must have been awesome because I went to get in the shower only to find the bat symbol drawn on my chest
That happened during battle shots lol
so as he was cumming he sort of growled with one eye squinted... for a moment there I thought I was fucking Popeye
I couldn't read the menu. I ordered the first thing I was able to read. Don't think I ate anything. Left $20 on the table.
10 shots in she's sitting on the floor using the open dishwasher door as a plate to eat her "life giving" pizza.
Well, if it's rabies, your lips will swell just prior to the frothing. Get a lot of good pics!
you were trying to drink the laundry detergent and yelling blue drankkkkk
Randomize
