I love you!
You're insane
Fuckin crazy man! Seriously though I think if you would have me I honestly seriously think about marrying u!
Alright now lets video chat so I can xshow u my dick! Hahahaha
Non-Jews are for practice
It was just so hard to get through Conan without crying like a baby. I'm just so proud of him.
it really sends the message that i like to impregnate mortal women and have them birth fantastic half man-half god infants.
i hope when i become a housewife i'm more of a gretchen and less of a vicky
hungover + watching bobsledding = i just puked
its simple. when his lips are on my clitoris i want to marry him. when they are speaking i want to kill him.
Sex tent. say it aloud its amazing. promise you we rnt stoned.
I caught him trying to shit in her bed. I asked him why he was doing it and he said "because it's wrong."
We team puked and then made sex like wild monkeys. If that isn't love, I don't know what is.
At a bar across from the city police station. I PROMISE I will do something great.
you made out with another girl for some wings
Did you put Adderal in the fishtank in the lobby? The fish are acting like Olympic sprinters. Asshole.
Ugh I don't want to adult today. I need like a dozen more coffees. Or cookies. They're interchangeable.
Very interesting. Let's just say I got home last night and threw up, found a joint in my bra, and woke up naked in my bed
Randomize
