I couldn't deal, she's a vegetarian. Every woman should like a little meat in their mouths.
youre talking to a girl on facebook chat right now and im sitting behind her in class lol. creepy?
Peeing in public by noon, this is not a good indicator for the day.
She made me go down the fire escape when her mom came for breakfast.
all i remember was you yelling "look at my little feet" at everyone on the way home from the bar.
I tried to say goodbye but you were hugging a trash can and I wasn't sure if you had clothes on
Thanks for your number, i want to ski with you, do party with you and sleep with you. Lucas.
The worst part about getting "creative" and by that i mean baked is that i just wanna get laid right now and all im doing is eating nachos
What happened to my knees?
You ate shit in front of the homeless people. They applauded.
Are you still going to come over for your post Alcoholics Anonymous beer?
OMG BTW REMEMBER HOW HE ORDERED PIZZA THAT ONE TIME WE HOOKED UP. APPARENTLY HE WAS HANDING IT OUT TO PEOPLE WHO LIVE IN MY BUILDING AS HE WAS LEAVING
I just spent a solid 3 minutes trying to figure out how to send a smell through my phone
I'm the only person who goes to break up a friends with benefits and comes out with a boyfriend
I used the line "you don't have enough pillows". Then left. Thought you should know.
I woke up in the bathtub with money shoved down my pants. I must've done something right.
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