I told u I don't really remember everything lol i pretty much remember not lasting as long as I norm and that I wore a condom, I hate condoms
I was actually kinda bummed my STD test came back negative.
That would have been proof he'd slept with the stripper. Lame.
on the last problem of the exam i just drew a picture of a cat and left
I'm drinking bacardi out of her mom's eco-green starbucks mug and chasing it with her sister's "for track only" vitamin water. Hello suburbia
when I sang my humps to you I meant it.
You started an entire relationship based only on sex and emoticons.
I cried singing "call me maybe" on the way home from the bar. What the fuck
I thi k this dude I fcken showed up to the bar in a raisins shirts. I thought I was better than that. Fuckkkk.
Just broke my no shot rule again.. Made out with a stranger. That's 0 for 3 this month for the record
We made a pact to go to the nursing home together... that way we could stay high till the bitter end. Do you not remember?
i swear i was one second from getting his number and then the shrooms kicked in
I tried to get more sleep but the universe decided I needed a drunken freshman instead
Dude mama brought home the bacon, i got his HBO account i guess that makes up for his by par skills in bed.
All I remember is me taking my automatic nerf gun getting on top of him and saying..."look whos in control now!"
Your mom asked you why you had bite marks all over your arms and you answered her by yelling "I HAD A SIESTA!"
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