I just google mapped his house on satellite so i can really see how much money he has. Does that make me shallow?
I googled "I hate my uterus" just to make sure I wasn't the only one.
Halloween 2010: the NuvaRing girls. You're Thursday. We'll walk into the party chanting "Monday, Tuesday, Wednesday, Thursday, Friday, Saturday, Sunday, Everydaaay".
I drowning out her crying with songs from the Beatles it's good for us both. She relives her 30s and i dont have to hear her cry
I made her cum... she sounded like Ray Romano
He asked if he could fuck me while on chat roulette.
I literally need to be slapped with another cock just to notice it.
mom and dad are asleep. time to fish my half-full bottle of wine out from under my bed and give this christmas visit a pick-me-up.
"half-full" seems a little optimistic for the turn your night is taking.
he convinced me that i wont have to do the walk of shame bc he has to go to jail in the morning
I got kicked out because I puked again I'm on the fire truck outside
I walk in and my roomie is fucking her bf while wearing lingerie and minnie mouse ears. Right in the childhood.
If someone told me one person in the department was secretly a death eater, I would suspect her, no contest.
Do you know how awkward it is to get a dick pic while working at babies r us?
I think putting on real pants was half my issue with today
He was gone when I woke up. But he left skid marks on my sheets and our unopened bottle of Titos is missing
New Rule: No more sleepovers with guys we met on Reddit
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