HELP! I am trapped in a douchebag ad... full of Affliction and Ed Hardy. Seriously? is he gonna leave his sunglasses on the entire 10 seconds of this encounter?
if there werent so many compromising pictures of me in the hands of so many liberal friends, id consider going into politics
When we started taking double shots of vodka and chasing it with a lick of fruit roll-ups, I knew there'd be hell to pay in the morning.
Do you remember unrolling paper towels as a blanket?
Like what kind of adult things? Whats more adult than drinking at 2pm on a monday?
Golf group in front of us has 2 hooker caddies. One guy was getting a lap dance as he waited to tee off. Only in vegas.
A man that refers to my vagina in third person is a man after my own heart.
That would make regret #10
He was more like the original regret
I'm reliable. I always make it home. I always throw up in the street too.
Mom and dad should be so proud half of their children have gotten naked in the same local grocery store
Yeah, I'm just gonna try to repress that and remember him for his big dick and perfect jawline.
But what if there are 6 people and they end up just pairing the off into 3 couples. Is it still an orgy?
Somewhere on my work laptop I have a map visualizing all the area codes that Ludacris has ho's
I hope that wasn't done on billed time
I can guarantee that it was
He lasted less than 30 sec. in bed and then sent me a friend request on LinkedIn. Wtf.
My one night stand from last weekend is now taking me on a date this weekend. How is this my life?
Randomize
