That weatherman I hooked up with is on TV again
Just saw 30+ dicks. Explain later.
How dare you send me a picture after midnight that isn't porn. You know the rules.
Semen is not good for contacts.
Im drunk with people I love less than you. fix it.
BRING ME THE PLAN B. ILL GIVE YOU A FREE WATER BOTTLE AND A BUMPER STICKER AND SOME BACON BITS
And fyi howling is not an acceptable form of communication.
Is everyone touching their nose at me a sign that I should stop snorting vicodin off my phone in the bathroom at school?
new costume idea. paint swatches and a ball gag... I'll be 50 shades of grey.
I told him finishing at the same time would be a long-term project. Like flipping a house. A sexual house.
He wanted me to choke him with my feet. So now I feel obligated to start writing my memoir
That portion can talk about stepping out of your comfort zone and how it can potentially kill people
Pretty sure my parents just hear me get off from the living room but I feel like they should be proud that I did it without a man honestly.
I think getting right with the Lord should involve more than me and a bottle of tequila.
Honestly cannot tell if I’m magical or really, really high.
NOT PREGNANT according to the two dollar tree pregnancy tests I took in the tacobell bathroom. Come meet me at tacobell for celebratory soft tacos.
Randomize
