She's got an ass you could write the declaration of independence on in one line. Takes up three bar stools.
his mom walked in while I was blowing him. he turned around in panic and accidentally punched me in the face. i have a black eye and only half the clothes i came here in. can you give me a ride?
you made me "pop lock and drop it" as a sobriety test last night..
i feel as if its time to shave my pubes but i should wait until before the party. nobody likes a sloppy drunk girl with a stubble-crotch.
story of my life.
you need to leave class get on facebook and start untagging IMMEDIATELY
It's sad the highlight of the night was you didn't electrocute yourself again.
is pulling out brownies in the middle of class on 4/20 just too obvious?
I fell asleep to him stroking my ass calling it his precious.
He just broke up w his most recent gf again, wish I could message her and be like it's not you he's gay.
Found her with a stray dog now called champagne, crying about how she feels a mom now. Had to take her home. The dog too.
I fucked him twice and then he set me up with his teammate. This kid does wonders for me
I'm going to give you the best blowjob of your life. And yes you can use my mom's printer.
I never said it was inaccurate, I said I hate you.
Is it disrespectful or patriotic to pole dance on an american flag pole?
How was your night?
Good. I made people cry and run home
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