its 9am and we're in an escalade. I have no shoes and my dress is on backwards. I feel like we're the morning after a rap video
we hate each other therefore the sex is mindblowing
It was the third Sunday in a row that I woke up in his bathtub. So no our sex life isn't that great anymore.
Ya bro it was wild. Hey, is latex digestible?
Y'know, "Class cancelled because Professor is stuck in Mexico," is not something I expected in college. Let alone, "Professor is stuck in Mexico, AGAIN."
I ate goldfish off your shoulder, I think we had bigger issues
Until they make a bed that bathes you in your sleep, I will not be satisfied.
Uhm after 8 I don't recall anything. All I know is there's a picture of me playing pong with my grandmother.
Sometimes you just have to have sex for a Netflix password.
When he was going down on me I referred to him as "Lord Snow" and HE GOT IT. HE GOT THE GAME OF THRONES REFERENCE. I AM IN LOVE
I can't help you right now because I'm shaving my feet...like a lady.
For the record you're a very classy lady and your love for and mastery of strap-ons is amazing. I would gladly marry you and father your offspring
If I don't get struck by a lightning bolt from God by midnight it will be a Christmas miracle.
You literally snort drugs up your nose and you’re questioning the brand of the multivitamin right now?
Peru was great. He sent me a text after thanking me for my amazing morals which confused me but made me oddly proud...then he texted a correction. He meant my amazing oral. Sadly this Made me prouder. Fuck u bitches and ur morally inhibiting gag reflexes.
Randomize