no more hot dogs for you........
fine no more vajj for you
I just googled dawgpound, shoulda seen that pornsite coming
Two girls are doing the worm relatively well on the bar floor after the fact I just saw one puke in the trash
How was the bike ride?
Nope. High in the basement. Fruit cups.
I'll make a Jello mold of your face so everyone can get drunk off your face
got my wristband ripped off, was told i can only be served water. please find me, i'll be running through the fountain
Its not the fact that i woke up wearing a tutu that bugs me its the fact that i have 75 photos of me wearing a tutu on facebook
Abby spilt her vodka all over the train's bathroom floor
WE'RE THE ONES DRESSED UP FOR THE LARGEST DRINKING HOLIDAY IN AMERICA WHO ELSE ON THIS TRAIN IS A SUSPECT FOR THIS SMELL?!
So because I'm off tomorrow that means your dick could be in my mouth majority of that time
My cousin is passed out in my room, so I just masturbated in my walk-in closet. Apparently I get off on danger. Make note of that.
Don't go to sleep yet I need your Mexican roots. Can you come make guacamole
Alright if I email the police department asking for my mug shot do you think they will email it to me
If it snows I'm making an igloo and getting wasted in it
I responded like every reasonable adult would. With a gif
I mean, drunk me really liked him, maybe sober me will too. Who am I to deny fate?
Randomize
