if you force a hooker to have sex with you and dont pay her would it be rape or theft? something to ponder
I just threw up, I'm either bulemic or pregnant, and I'm now accepting bets on which it is
Drank beer out of a hotwheels bucket all night
you took a scissor and started screaming "I WANNA KNOW WHAT ITS LIKE TO BE BALD"
He has been begging me for a Bj but doesnt want to get mono
How is he gunna get mono? is he gunna suck on his dick after you?
She gave 2 thumbs up when Nirvana came on the radio while blowing me in the bathroom
We found her hiding in the bath tub.. And when i opened the curtain she replied "thank you" and walked out like nothing happened.
We saluted the chips to the national anthem before cooking them. The house has to get a munchies fryer
Highlight of the week: I had sex with a B movie star wearing an eye patch.
I know you're gay. But if I'm not getting dick, then you have to. That's what friends do.
Might I also add after my boss threw up in the garbage can and yelled puking rally, he dougied, then told me I wasn't about that life.
On a completely unrelated note I think I have carpal tunnel
Again, totally unrelated
this new dose of ADD meds is totally being waisted with the unemployed new graduate thing if only I could add my hyper focused side effects to a coverletter
How fast can you get here?\nI need to ride your cock into the sunset.
In Texas. Drank way too much wine. Puked in a gallon zip lock bag. Passed out at 445 with the ENTIRE family here. Got up at 745 in time for dinner. I made you proud!!!
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