The weather is perfect in Seattle right now. Warm enough for girls to not wear bras, but cold enough for me to see them nipping out in the shade.
We stopped her at 12
12 shots? Or 12 midnight?
Which answer would freak you out less
I had the spins so badly it was like I was having sex with 2 girls
nothing like Chinese food and masturbating on a Saturday night
Also...you were trying to touch his balls without him noticing
Somewhere along the night we ended up at a food lion giving jello shots to high school girls.
The bad decision stars are too close to aligning to risk this tonight.
You had your dick do your apologizing for you last night. Apology accepted.
You dropped a beer and it was like when wilson floated away. Complete with sobbing apologies
Shit, no womder she didn't wanna fuck me
I never thought I would have to put a band-aid on my penis.
We just stood outside and debated the existence of mermaids for about 20 min. Is this what too drunk is?
We were in a bathroom while 4 dudes compared dick piercings.
Buffalowww
i think i left you like a 5 minute message about the mcchicken burger i was eating. I think I called wanting sex but the mcchicken burger was a lot more seducing.
Ben Franklin would totally be a furry.
You're smoking weed and checking Tumblr I take it?
What's the weirdest place you've ever had sex?
I don't think you're psychologically prepared for this conversation.
Randomize
