I'm cheering for the colts this year. I basically have to since my fake says i'm from indianapolis
Well, I guess this was as good a night as any to find out I don't know how to use my fire extinguisher.
No joke. Last we saw of him he was naked and dragging that stupid goat into the bushes.
a commercial for my antidepressant came on and they said you shouldn't take if if you drink right as i took a shot
god is laughing at you again
You haven't puked in my sink in over a year.. Youre coming over this weekend
Just saw the guy with the plastic bag on his head riding his bike again...
He threw me a bud light and when I opened it he smacked it out of my hand because "Dave giveth, and Dave taketh away". WTF
My meds have diminished my sex drive, this must be what regular women feel like
So the night ended when we tried making fireworks out of gunpowder and oregano. You can figure out how that went.
I was scared I had HIV after last time so I'm not gonna do it again
But he was really hot
Glad you don't have HIV
Dude, you can't even imagine the trip, I actually thought that there were Care Bears sitting next to me at the bar, I'm pretty sure I started hitting on the pink one.
Whatever. I have his dick. Haha how many girls can say they have a dildo replica of a guy they were seeing
I don't think it's ever a good night if I'm this hung over and I didn't even get an orgasm out of the deal...
Drugs and unwanted pregnancies are the only things that I'm good at. College comes in at a close third.
First time not coming to this class high in a month and a half, never again will i put myself thru this torture
Randomize
