I may just buy something cuz i have 6 weddings in the next year and a half.
Holy shittt I don't even have a bf
Just saw truck nuts on a handicap conversion van
if you could put a roof over IU campus it would be the biggest whorehouse in the nation
He went soft
Wait. During?
Yeah, he was IN. MY. MOUTH.
watching my parents drink 4 loko out of usf cups playing pool and rocking out to ACDC...
Can I come live with you?
i know im back at school when i can poke any random spot on my body and expect a 80% chance that theres a bruise there
Apperanlty I was screaming "It's hard to swim with a broken ankle sir" and then tackled the lifeguard. The joys of blackouts
Just saw the guy with the plastic bag on his head riding his bike again...
I just realized I'm trading you a pregnancy test for the morning after pill...
It's been a bad semester.
I want a burrito.
Truly, you are the voice of a generation.
At least you have booty calls.
True. I just waste them though. I feel like I need to be told "there are people in this world who would give anything for just one and you have two." You know in that same tone your parents told you about the starving people in china
You should have seen her, she looked like a skinny Jabba The Hutt
That literally makes no sense
Exactly
It wasn't a mystery that it was the pizza cooking in the oven when we stumbled out of the bedroom in a smoke filled apartment at 2am. We are dangerous drunks
It was an all night sausage fest and I was the lady of honor.
You wouldn't happen to know why there's an inflatable monkey riding a mattress on my roof would you?
Randomize
