May have finally hit rock bottom...bouncer from the strip club informed me I wore the same shirt last night
im dirt poor will suck dick for halloween costume
I'm so bored, I can only pretend that this truck is a spaceship for so long.
I love reading their "i love you more" , "no i love you more" war on facebook today knowing that he hooked up with me last night. I bet i know who wins that one.
There are many reasons why he shouldn't come over. And each one is longer than his penis.
Oh my god my life; so much cake and so little sex
Yay for living on the edge. I'm trying this new thing where I stop mom-arming people and promote bad decisions. It's working quite well.
this is terrible I feel like i'm trapped in a cage with a wild republican
We watched scrubs, then I got a shower blowjob which led to shower sex and the living room floor sex. Now she's baking cookies. I may not be studying, but I'm doing something right.
Please tell me that SOMEONE, SOMEWHERE, has created a drink called a 'Tequila Mockingbird'. PLEASE.
Funny how the post-sex UTI lasted longer than the entire relationship.
only I would find a long lost relative through a craigslist casual encounters ad
this is an emotional support booty call
Don't go to jail over some guy named Bunky
I can't go to the bars anymore. She wanted to see me again and I drunkenly told her I was moving today. If she spots me I'm fucked.
Randomize
