is 69 when you're sideways or up & down? I was on my back & confused.
just spent about 3 1/2 hours looking for a dollar so I can buy weed.
suggestion: become a stripper.
I puked in the coffee maker. I wouldn't make coffee tomorrow morning if I were you
I thought making out with his sister would be a great way of meeting him. But it backfired.
God she is annoying. I am only keeping her around on fb because I want to see if her baby comes out looking like an alien or not.
You got into a heated argument about Frankenstein's intelligence while double fisting burritos from taco bell.
It's like refusing a bong hit from michael phelps... You just can't do it
Come get your boy. He's cuddling with a bag of rice on the floor.
Had sex with one of the guys from Ireland. Celebrating st pattys early.
I just want to be like i dont know you but ive seen your penis & i like it
You informed me your place was now a nudist colony and unless I was there to drink schnapps with the cat I had to strip.
I FUCKED WHEELCHAIR DUDE
HE'S INTO WEIRD SHIT
GOOD KIND OF WEIRD SHIT
I tried to text you about going to the Lion's Den but sent it to my boss. She was down for it. Please advise.
I am way to hungover for it to be Thursday.
I promise it wsnt a penis when i put it in my mouth
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