I have a pretty basic diameter of my vaginal abyss. I'm sure it won't hurt.
Quoting wale wont save you from herpes
so this guy on craigslist is offering a case of beer to shave his back. i think i'm gonna take him up on it.
i'm going through the NYU 2014 group looking for future drunken hookups. too slutty?
Somebody started a fire in the kitchen. I puked on it till it went out. The firemen high fived me.
He told me he wouldn't do any drunk sluts but me. I guess that's sort of a compliment...?
I've never seen so many strippers at a funeral...
I started dipping tositos in my screwdriver last night
then apparently I went "not bad" and continued
I woke up with my panties in the cat food dish, and everything covered in honey and bruises.
im on the hungover til tuesday pabst blue ribbon diet
He told me how it ended, then I blew him.
So he ruined the best cinematic experience of your life and you REWARDED him??
She ordered an O'douls. That was the end of that date
It's okay, big boobs are better than running.
Seriously, he's as bad as Joffrey. I hope this ends like Game Of Thrones did.
I have no idea what happened last night, but my pee is neon green.
Randomize
