is swine flu sexually transmttd?
Ha no, why?
sriously ive never had a hangovr this bad
my mom just informed me my dog smells like cum
Anthony wouldn't know good sex if it sat on his face
just fell over trying to sit on the toliet like a robot.
Ive never seen someone more dtf than a soaking wet drunk girl who stumbles into your backyard.
No now hes going to beat me to our goal of getting someone to have sex in the library. I hate periods.
I don't know what to judge you more for.
i don't know where i am. i made bad decisions. i think this guy is dead.
I am not apologizing for rubbing my balls on your leg...that is a risk you take when you come out to the bar with me
Hey remember that spam cooked in dr pepper we made? 10x better when the dr pepper is rum
I just stole some rubbers from the girl I stayed with last night so I can use them on a different girl today..
So to add to headbutting the microwave while waiting for my hot pockets to cook. I apparently told both bartenders earlier in the night I was going to fuck them both. I hate black out drunk me..
Btw...refried beans is a terrible thing to throw up.
I had nothing but condoms at the checkout, then grabbed a pack of Orbitz gum and said "gotta protect from bad breath" felt like a boss
just saw those girls we met the other night. i happen to be wearing a bunny suit and driving your smart car. i think its safe to say thats a no go situation.
Next time I say "i forgot to eat dinner, oh well" before drinking STRAP ME TO A CHAIR AND FORCE FEED ME BEFORE ALLOWING ME TO CONSUME BOOZE
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