I play with my boobs when I'm bored. I playwith my nipples whe I'm drunk
you ever wonder how lesbians feel about girls being in relationships with other girls on facebook? could it annoy them more than it annoys me?
Next thing I know we're all standing in the kitchen holding hands and thanking God for the beer.
Would you have sex with a guy wearing a Batman mask?
It's all hypothetical, I don't have a Batman mask... yet...
Watching her eat just hurts me
if you fuck our toilet off the wall again, i'm going to be so mad.
if i dont text back till morning its cause i turned my phone off and changed my password to something i wont remember to stop myself from drunk texting...RESPONSIBILITY
I think if you have sex on the couch it will psychologically damage it.
THIS IS A TERRIBLE REWARD FOR NOT GETTING PREGNANT.
Just an FYI i'm going to get drunk as shit while you are on duty and attempt to not fall into the bathtub again.
Rodger that.
There are horrible decisions in life and then there are tequila flavored moonshine decisions
Bank just called....we left my debit card in the ATM last night.
Is it bad that if I found out I couldn't have kids I'd be more pissed that I've been using unnecessary condoms than the fact that I'll never be a mother?
When the people downstairs start talking about drugs, I second guess buying my drugs from them. Then I remember they are cheap and convenient.
I don't know if it was the movie or the drugs but after i watched it i wore the same spongebob shirt to school for two weeks and stopped showering
Randomize
