It was the single greastest thing to happen to my dick ever
make sure i look cute passed out on the couch.
so when I got there he was dressed as jesus in a recliner drinking whiskey out of the bottle watching spanish porn. Then kept shouting dont judge me or ill judge you. we didn't even go to a halloween party.
he made me scream out "#24" while we fucked...no more football players
i hate always having to make my eye shadow look really good since my eyes always end up closed by the end of the night in pics
My name in their phones is "That Girl". If i can't get it to go away, I might as well live up to it.
Amazing how you can get from "Merry Christmas" to sex in three texts.
I could have done it in 2
My tits, and hanging out behind a hotel eating pizza.
THERE IS A VIDEO OF DMX SINGING RUDOLPH THE RED NOSE REINDEER
I'm officially in the Christmas spirit
Whenever you get off. By "pick me up from work" I mean, "pick me up from a bar by work at your earliest convenience" :)
That's why you bone lesbian cage fighters and 45 year olds. To make life less boring.
We get drunk and make out in different places. Is that what love is?
I just got a girl to make out with me just by saying "get at me." Get at me
It finally happened my mom knowingly gave me money to buy drugs i knew this day would come\n
Yah. Then he started clapping my boobs together in his hands and started shouting "the seas are angry!"
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