its like he missed a chap in the "being a guy" handbook and read the bible instead
Just joined the godiva rewards club. Who's the fat friend now.
thanks for brining me home and putting me in my bed. the pillow fort your built around me is also appreciated.
ohhh no, absolutely not. i am waaayyy too superstitious to have sex with the self-proclaimed "baby-maker" on father's day...
yes we did fuck in his chapter room. yes it was demeaning. and yes, they probably will discuss it at chapter tonight.
After the second day the hotel realized I wasn't responsible enough to have a comforter, so they took it for the rest of the trip.
Send me the video of myself under the polar bear skin. It's important.
Idk. Last year there was an ice luge, glow in the dark jungle juice, and lots of naked people. I feel like I'll get pregnant just thinking about going to that party.
Based on my body hair location, my ancestors had very cold hamstrings and very warm chests
Is there a polite way to say "Sorry for your head injury but I still want to hook up"?
I was about to take him home and fuck his brains out but then the police came and arrested him for the stolen credit card he had been buying me drinks with all night...
The man sent me a video of him doing the helicopter, the least I can do is go visit him in the hospital
I already plan to donate my brain to science so they can attempt to fully understand the complexities of my existence
All I remember is me taking my automatic nerf gun getting on top of him and saying..."look whos in control now!"
I know we agreed to cock block each other from now on buttt I WANT this one. I have felt his penis, it is godly, and I am going to have it inside of me, so shut the fuck up and leave.
Randomize
