New policy: when a woman uses the word blowjob in a sentence within 5 minutes of meeting her, you buy her a drink.
that was probably me. ive bitten a lot of people.
You should get with him and swear you have to use lambskin condoms. That'll test his veganism.
Dude, I found out having naked people in your car is a felony.. Now were all fucked.
A little light bondage fun never hurt anybody (erotic asphyxiation excluded). Car batteries attached to reproductive organs have.
Talked to Nate, told him he was a douche. Will give details when sober. It's ok. You're my best friend together a wolf pack. Olive juice.
Woke up with two different flip flops on sum burnt at the beach. Who are these French kids plz come back
I guess I can give it a shot. I usually just get belligerently drunk and go where my penis and feet lead me. No fights or getting too lost, so they seem to be doing a good job
wtf... you literally introduced yourself as "that friend who's going to fuck all your other friends."
I hope you know that means regardless of their gender.
The inflatable penis from those pics was mine... We broke him that night
Good, be his mentor. Like a tiny gay Yoda.
I will read books by day and do guys by night. A mental and physical enlightenment, if you will.
I'm not real sure what dinosaurs sound like, but dude, she made dinosaur noises.
Definitely didn't just make out with a guy the same height as me just because we wanted to see what it would be like to not have to reach up....
Apparently i disappeared and no one found me until the morning , but i have fifty missed calls
Randomize
