she was talking to me but i could help but stare at the extremely long hairs on her boobs. then she says, "your looking at the hair on my boobs aren't you"
We need to start having rules for the weekends. Like no more downing 3 shots because we want to slut dance a little harder or because biggie just came on.
We almost died tonight..we almost die every night. but tonight was the closest by far
Playing hide and seek with all those cheeseburgers... Not our finest moment.
Time to do stuff I know I'll have to hide from my grandkids one day and everyone at next weekends wedding.
Apparently you need a permit for a flamethrower.
Don't bang him. The amount of Jack Johnson he listens to is embarrassing for even a white person.
Um...celebrating is an understatement. You flashed the guy at the mexican restaurant and then screamed, "It's just my bikini, I swear!"
oh god my hair smells like rotten vegetables, sweat, and tequila. I wanna party with your neighbors every night.
This chick had a microhand. Fucking, like, jerking off a baby carrot would make it look like corn.
PS my house is a mess.
pps I have a rash on my face.
Hey, I told her the bathroom was a "No fly zone" after I used it. She willingly allowed her nose to go through that pain. It's her fault, she only supplied me with vodka when she knows I only drink rum.
I met his parents. We played twister. My boob popped out.
I've peed in two sinks in the past two weeks. No one should be able to say that.
We had an argument over whether or not she had super strength. She settled it by dragging me to the bed room and throwing me on the bed. Then forcefully fucking me. She won the argument.
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