Brogan sounds similar to Bridget...sorta.
Every girl's name is automatically translated to "Baby/Milk Carrier" in my brai
question. what would be the least awkward way to ask your one night stand if he came inside of you because you would really prefer not to have his illegitimate lovechild. hypothetically.
Promise me that if I become one of those sad people that facebook pesters you to 'reconnect with' you'll tell me so I can delete mine and save myself the humiliation?
What's the kids name that was drinking stale beer and redbull out of the blender?
mom came into my room and asked to borrow some condoms. We have gotten to the point where it's not awkward anymore.
Are you seriously trying to guilt me into sending you naked pictures by saying "So I can look at them during dialysis" ?
Is it working?
Seriously, I look like I crawled out of a bog. Succeeding at being as undateable as possible.
I got my dick out in a gay bar for just one free shot. I didn't know I could be bought so cheap
THE VODKA TRAIN IS NOW PULLING INTO THE STATION
You were drink-wine-from-the-bottle drunk trying to take everybody's blood pressures again.
I guess that's what I get for clicking on a link that says clown penis.
We need some Captain and Fanta. That shit will change your life. Sidenote, bring an IV drip to hook me to in the morning
I wanna stuff your vagina full of Reese's peanut butter hearts and eat you clean
So, i might have left my morals back in 2011.
She and I had some intense sexual tension earlier when she dumped a package of apple straws all over my body.
Randomize
