Just saw 2 very young girls abandon baby buggys in the Xwalk to fight. Gotta love Holyoke.
beer pong: waldo and ernie vs. bacon and eggs... i love halloween
then he pulled down his pants, and i just stared for about a minute..... i was so confused. i didnt know my cat could have a bigger penis than an 18 year old man.
Quick question... Why were there condoms frozen into ice cubes?
Let's just say that watching the sunrise in a space helmet is really the only way to do it.
The cops are here to take me to jail, so I guess I have to go with them. If I'm not out by 6 p.m., there is some left-over lasagna in the fridge for you.
I have got to stop making out with redheads. I need to sign my life over to my dad like Britney Spears.
The stripper was waving you to the stage, not up on the stage. That's why you got choked out.
If you don't sing me a lullaby then I'll just take shots till I pass out
He's a prodigy! It would be a service to the scientific community.
15 is 15
when the repo soundtrack came on in the middle of us having sex i realized it was about time that i clear out my itunes library
This is the third time my roommate and I have drunkenly hooked up. I'm starting to think she's not as straight as she says she is.
There is a couple fucking in the outback bathroom and at first I thought it was sick but than I remembered my Outback fantasy with you and decided I can't pass judgements.
Went upstairs to make PopTarts, found the door open. Shut it. Saw a grey thing. Opened the door, found a girl sleeping outside. What the fuck happened last nigh
I need advice on ways to politely say “fuck you on your way to hell”.
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