so today I found out that she used to be a he....
are you gonna get a divorce?
i might even pee on it at walmart i am so nervous
I've seriously contemplated telling him the baby isn't his just so I can meet Maury Povich
we made out inside of a kiddie slide for about 20 mins. it was the sexiest, most suffocating experience I've ever had
I wouldn't accept the money so he folded the $20 bill into an origami puppy and left a note saying "Not blowjob money"
I hope the walls stop moving before my manager notices that i'm still drunk.
I am literally hand feeding my crying ex boyfriend taco bell. What has my life become?
The nursing school interview showed me a picture of my passed out during your party. They asked if this was a frquent thing. I told them you drugged me.
did you really just send me an instagramed dick pic?
DR UNK TOWN USA
TEAM USA GO AMERICA
How am I so hungover that wearing sunglasses hurts my head?
you were like "guys ... i think i got fingered while dancing tonight"
our poor poor cab driver
He gave me the award for most entertaining blow job. That should count for something.
Three of my exes and one of my exes' brothers have hit me up and it's only been a week. I hate semester break.
Is it wrong to want to use the Dark Web to buy Vyvance for legitimate purposes?
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