Is it creepy to message a girl and say you had me at stocked liquor cabinet?
Next time we go to the river, we nominate you to flash people for free booze. Your tits are the biggest.
at the end of the day, college isnt gonna be for everyone... and some of us are just going to have to learn how to breathe underwater while sucking cock.
Can we promise no matter what that we have sex the night the Mayan calendar runs out?
dude, i warned you that using a card to pay for my hotel room was a bad idea. You deserve the extra $600 in cleaning fees
We don't have any ice, so I'm using the frozen cognac to reduce the swelling on Abby's toe.
Head-banging is a very stupid way to injur yourself. But this opinion is also coming from somebody who can't walk right because they cut their asshole shaving last night, so it probably has little to no merit.
We perfected the quiet ass slap during sex so his roommate wouldn't wake up.
He made me cum via FaceTime, then he made me look at his stock investment charts..
I think the only option is to smoke so much weed I just pass out for 3 days.
Does puke ruin car paint? Good thing it's raining.
My boobs smell like weed again. This happens way too often.
I really just gave up on masterbating because I'm too tired. I really am getting old.
so i went over to her house and we played crash bandicoot, ate calzones, and had sex all day. im in love.
Is constant horniness a medical condition? Because a husband, a boyfriend and an office side piece should be enough penis for one girl - but they’re not :-(
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