do you believe in love at first sight?
awwwwww =)
yea.. so can i have your sisters number? thanks!
apparently i'm not the first person wake up and realize she's ugly cuz i tore this house apart and there is no sign of my clothes
I love how you send me nude pics of girls you're fucking and name them by which city they're in instead of their name. "This is Nashville, this is Tupelo, this is Jackson..."
i convinced her i was a yoga teacher by showing her some warm-ups my high school track coach made up
I just watched nsync videos for the past half hour and you could totally tell lance bass was gay in all of them
Honey, I don't care how "classic you" this is. It's not gonna matter if we can't find you in the morning.
She apparently grabbed another girl and pulled her into the shower fully clothed. When the girl was like "you need to stop" she curled up into a ball and refused to leave.
Whoa, you know how to pick em.
This weekend I forgot a cup, so I drank my wine out of a Pringles can. So classy. You would have been so proud.
Liar. My heart is broken and my boobs are disappointed.
She took me to ER. She says thought it was a squirtgun filled with vodka and she was 'marking me for later.' Thank god it's a flesh wound, and we're cool and going to date.
gtg, the cops are here
He actually said the words 'I miss you' followed by 'I wanna have sex with your face'. I'd say that's a win.
sex on a bike is impossible
challenge accepted
Don't worry. I have logic.... just not morals.
Ohhhhhh, that night......I need to stop drinking, almost all of my conversations that take place Wed thru Sun after 8:30 are one blurry haze.
Do you think it's a bad sign of the outcome of the pregnancy test I'm about to take that I was eating a fudgsicle on the way into the drugstore? Would it make worse to tell you I also bought a big ass bag of Cornnuts?
Randomize