Did you call me this morning? I was really drugged up and don't remember.
Have a good day. My vagina shrank.
Freshman orientation day on campus. Dear diary, JACKPOT.
Boxed wine mondays was one of our finer ideas
Dude just pulled his dick out and started stroking it and making s sound like cocking a shotgun....wtf was in those e pills
I told him I wanted to "ride him like a show pony" I think he gets the picture
With 4 extra seconds dedicated to the dong.
These kind of text worry me.
where will you be at 9:30 tonight?
piledriving you in your roommate's bed?
Update: that felon in Georgia I slept with is now a police officer. What a wonderful world
I told her I was going to sleep early last night. I probably should not have sent that snapchat of us playing beer pong.
I feel like my sexual preferences are just another sign that I am a 75 year old drag queen in a 29 year old woman's body.
My penis has like 3 people bidding on it
I was just tongue fucked into oblivion.
Let's just say that I took off my pants and I had superman boxers on. Then she took off her pants and she had batman panties on. I think she's the one!
Why are there 17 orders of shrimp lo mein in the bathtub?
But once you are just right and I work my tongue in the right spots and hot wax your balls and inner thighs. I will have you right where I want you.
Who is this?
Oops wrong number
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