i've got a dick and you've got a pussy....what is the problem??
Mel Gibson is dating a 24 year old
You're not Mel Gibson and I'm not 24.
where are you?
sonic
Good. I hungoveredly cleaned your room. This is what being married is going to be like. I pick the condoms up off the floor and you bring home the hot dogs.
Harry Potter. Singing. Sobering up. In that order.
We almost died tonight..we almost die every night. but tonight was the closest by far
We didn't need to cut her off. I'm pretty sure the lit candle she almost drank would have done it for us
It's going to be so weird waking up tomorrow morning fully rested completely sober and not covered in piss or bruises.
I wore wrist and ankle weights while we had sex. Does that count as working out?
IM NOT TALKING TO YOU UNTIL YOU MAKE A PROCLAMATION YOU LOVE ME MORE THAN TACOS
we were both freshly single and using each other as rebounds. most intense sex I've ever had. i felt like a grizzly bear emerging from hibernation in a whirlwind of sexual fury
Twice. I only peed my pants twice tonight.
What's clit gel and why is it in my wallet.
Hung out near hay bales in sweaters then she gave me a pumpkin spice pop rocks bj. That was so freakin' seasonal.
I feel like the dump I just dropped is the most successful thing I've done so far today.
And also ice skating can blow me. Goodnight, love you!
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