Ok so serious question: if one wanted to say the plural of mongoose, would it be mongooses or mongeese?
standing in the yard with no pants on waiting for google maps to come and take a picture.
There were so few words spoken that I'm not sure if it was make-up or break-up sex.
I just realized how early it is, you're taking this booty call thing to a whole other level. also, there are altoids all over my room, that was weird
While looking for an apartment, I've realized that the way I rate balconies is on the "how easy would it be to smoke weed here" scale.
What other scale is there?
Guy hitting on me at bar is guy who's Craigslist ad we laughed at the other night. Not even kidding.
I like to play this game where I try to reach orgasm before my bathtub overflows....lost tonight.
Well she started to strip and when she slung her hair at me, she painted my face with sweat. A LOT OF SWEAT. It was a weird boner.
i convinced him to be a french maid for halloween. he has no idea what he's in for. i just ordered the breast forms.
My boss doesn't know what jello shots are. I've lost faith in this company.
What's the worst that could happen? I'm already broke and my leg's already broken
I had sex upstairs in my parents house, and my mom texted me and said "those raccoons are out of control in the walls."
He showed me his sex playlist and it looked good, so I slept with him.
Heading there now. Already have a boner.
When you called me I said did you make it home. You said yeah. Then you said you didn't know where you were. I said you were at home and you said but where. I said you are in the bathroom. Then you said oh, you're so smart lol
Randomize
