did you make any bad decisions?
many, i pretty much fell in love with a freshman...it doesn't get much better than that
I just sold weed to a guy holding a baby...does this make me a bad person?
Grab the Coors Light. Its time to get NASCAR drunk
its hard to take this fight seriously when one dude is an oompa loompa, and the other is a "g spot"
I jerked him off and then punched him in the face for no reason. Typical evening drinking Sailor Jerry's.
I just had a brazillian performed by a hungarian named olga. Im pretty sure she was trying to rip out my soul. You owe me a million orgasms
I have your car and your sandals. My shoes are somewhere under the puke couch. Safari time.
We're walking, taxis are a waste of money that can be spent on alcohol.
Went home last night with a guy in a tutu, didn't know he was wearing a tutu until he threw it at me in the bedroom. God I love Halloween.
Talking to him sober hurts my brain
Anne is dead. totally passed out and was flat out in the street
just because i'm not a monk anymore doesn't mean I need to tell you about my new sex life.
which is fantastic by the way.
"hahahaha" is not a sufficient reply when I tell you my mother laughed at a joke about me giving blowjobs.
I'm very disappointed that your kitten almost ate my weed cake...
momentary stint on a second floor library computer...guy next to me snorted blue adderall off his notebook through a cut straw, i cant tell if this guy is my hero or just plain crazy...
Randomize
