She described it as "a squirrel being hit by a hurricane"
Then all the boys were saying that they were amazed at how much i could smoke...i'm so proud of myself
I think the universe is against us being together. Or maybe it's just god's way of telling me there is a bigger dick out there for me.
He's been dancing to the same Rob Thomas album in his room for almost 8 hours now. Please never, ever bring extacy over here again.
Just sneezed out a half gram of coke into a tissue. Four hours after the fact. The bender continues.
I don't want to have to force feed him my vagina!!
u r missing out we r watching a tranny direct traffic in a gstring
It's nights like those I refer to my life motto: You can't be just friends with someone after you've seen their genitals.
Oh and someone pissed in my shoes, so I'll let you figure that out.
He brought me breakfast in bed after our one night stand. Beer and Cheerios I may come back to this place
I'm wearing fairy wings and I broke my wizard staff. If this isn't the most happy but sad moment of my life , I don't know what is.
His brother just asked him in all seriousness if it would be cool if they became eskimo brother brothers.
I'm so bored I talked to the Bible guys for 30 minutes.
I offered them beer last time they came here bahaha
ITS THE CIIIIIIRCLE OF SLUUUUUUUTS
there's still a lot i don't remember, like why my iphone's nailed to your wall
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