I think I just sat on my labia. Can I borrow some scotch tape?
she keeps The Day After Pill in her bra... there is a God.
sitting next to michael phelps in the airport. wonder if he's carrying...
unrelatedly i think im gonna download boogie nights just to see mark wahlberg's penis
i feel like his penis is a security blanet. i cant fall asleep unless its in my hand
Would it help you get over me if I told you that I had unprotected sex last night?
She clogged the toilet and got it out with a seven eleven bag. I tried to tell her no but she was convinced that was the logical thing to do.
I was told u were the one who could explain to me why i woke up in the running shower, still in my dress and heels
Nope, I'm sticking to passive aggressive punishments. Like mismatching his socks and cumming on his leather couch. OCD is so wonderful.
If she makes a move, pretend to have a seizure.
All I want to do is fuck in the bell tower before it leave this school. Is that too much to ask?
OH MY GOD DO YOU REMEMBER WISHBONE? DO YOU REMEMBER THAT LITTLE BITCH? WHAT'S THE STORY WISHBONE
It mathmatically balances. Less pants + more shirt = fully clothed. see? Not a whore!
All I know is that at 4 am I was walking down the street in my bra and his shorts and Im pretty sure I passed my grandma on her morning walk.
It's barely past noon, how am I already talking about double penetration
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