Until that no good dick sucking whore stays away from my boyfriend I am gonna start blowing all of his friends...
Thats the last time I go out drinking with my Irish friends. Two shots of flaming sambucca = bar on fire. I was only trying to high five the barman.
I just typed my entire senior project presentation on my blackberry,
Springtime is officially here. I just used pool water to fill up the bong
It was worth having to clean the cum stains out of the carpet.
Knitting and drinking wine. Forget my 21st birthday, might as well just skip to my 60th
There comes a time where you just have to sit back and watch the drunken idiots pee on each other
there is a video of me on Facebook getting mad at a trash bin what the fuck was in your Pepsi
All I see when I think of you are dancing penis angels around your head.
My vagina feels like it's been kissed by angels.
Awareness is good for change and all, but ignorance is bliss. I like bliss.
Told my brother the truth how I meet her...I grabbed the first thing I could when the cops came. 10 months later we are engaged.
Thanks for bringing me tea/a bucket. You have earned yourself a face touch.
Thanks to you I can't show my boobs tomorrow for the interview.
You came in wearing a whipped cream bikini what did you think would happen
Was that before, or after strip tac toe.....
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