I must be too annoying 4 u.
i guess. but if i can salvage this and still somehow see you naked i feel like that's a win
hey is it cool if i invite some fat girls to the party so i can be the skinny one?
yeah okay. but if i take one home with me you have to come over in the morning and tell her to get her shit and go.
I think you should know he took my pants (buttons and zippers included) and my thong off with his mouth alone. I found my husband
They are baked and once again have spent the last 45 mins talking about opening up a world wide business called "pickle on a stick"
Any parent would be proud to have a daughter that's a blowjob fairy
I had to help you off the toilet floor because you couldn't get up, then you threw your drink on the floor and just said "oh dear" really calmly.
I feel like a cloud. A cloud that wants to be laid.
Like I feel like I use my high IQ for the wrong things
In the mean time, I'll continue to kick ass at running and become a successful stripper while he might hook up with one average looking girl he met at a club. I so win.
I know it's like I wanna bring somebody fun who I haven't drunkenly expressed my feelings for. Or hooked up with. It's a struggle.
I couldn't find a lighter, so I smoked a bowl with a birthday candle.
shit i just threw up on a freshman
i don't know if i should laugh or feel bad..
nevermind it was a sophmore, laugh.
Hammered...8am...why is there chickens in the living room?
I stared at his dick and then told him to get on his knees
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