so i just googled the prescription for aldara i saw on your desk this morning...
i overslept, had to take a cab to the train station, might puke, bought the wrong flavored vitamin water, and mj's dead. what a terrible world to wake up to.
If Jon and Kate can get divorced...how hard can it be for me?
I met him yesterday and now he's wanting to hold hands and kiss in public. i hate this
Why am I a bad person? You were the one trying to get people to eat tape.
I tried carrying you from the bathroom to your bed and you begged me to bring the toilet too
Oh btw, that was a wonderful blow job. You did a good job.
You told me you aren't worried about the police that you've been training for this an that the last three months of your life have been devoted to building up your stun gun tolerance and pepper spray recovery time.
ur not supposed to find someone to make out with when ur bf takes u to his SISTERS house to hang out with her and her husband
Apparently at 2 AM I decided to let the world know about my newfound love for elephants
My flask has coffee in it for finals week.. So that's responsible right?
I told him that we shouldn't complicate things. He responded with a dick pic.
The beauty of his penis is distracting me from the fact that he was born after Princess Diana died
I really want to stop getting this drunk. I've got the Sunday scaries and it's only Saturday
So she was amazing, that's what. Idk if it was the blow or the blowjob, but both my heads are still tingling.
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