im letting my talent of no gag reflex go to waste
Ricky Martin is gay. You owe me $10 from 3rd grade.
Its 11am everyones wasted wearing sombreros and eating fresh produce..cesar chavez would be very proud
we turned his baptism video into a drinking game
He told me he doesn't dance and he hates drunken excitement. Why I ever thought it would work is beyond me.
I have no idea what happened after 2 AM. I woke up on my bike, in my bed, with a deep thigh bruise.
its sad that I know 23 beers will fit into my purse
Two words. Shotgunning Cognac.
This has already gotten way out of hand
how much boxed wine can one drink before work in a couple of hours?
I need all the beers. I want to be holding on to the grass so I don't fall off the earth drunk.
Maybe why that's why I'm perpetually single... I can't find a guy with bigger balls than mine.
Why exactly is there a butt plug on the counter?
And now, by the power vested in me by the state of intoxication, I now pronounce you fucking awesome.
when i woke up w mysterious sticky crap in my hair, i assumed i had another blackout hookup. nope. turns out i made PBJ and proceeded to pass out in it. i ate the evidence when i woke up.
Have you ever thought, hey maybe the reason we were togather that long was because I was drunk the whole relationship?
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