Remember that time I came into your room after taking a muscle relaxant and we argued about what state has the longest coastline?
kyle and i were puking, simultaneously, off the front porch at 4 am, and in the middle of it he looks up, reaches his hand over, and says "knucks." And then I proceeded to fist bump him. By farrr the best time I've ever had puking.
just chugged some gatorade and threw it up. todays gonna be awesome
Just saw you drinking out of a flask on national tv. I've never been more proud of you
you were upstairs in your room looking out your window and saw him puking in your bushes outside. you then proceeded to open the window and sing Come To My Window
Pretending to be completely fried so the odd girl next to me doesnt suspect im simply staring at her.
I'm a 23 year old adult who just ordered condoms online from Target because I'm still too embarrassed to buy them in the store.
I'm filtering his penis picture so I can see it better
I'm trying to puke quietly so i don't ruin my grandma's birthday/my graduation brunch. And you say i need to grow up.
I mean I only got hit in the ass with ONE firework
Not only did she fulfill a life long dream of mine of banging in a library, she bought me subway for lunch. I feel like I got the best gold star ever today.
Well, I crapped my pants in front of her entire family, was laughed out of their house, and I had to walk home with shit stained pants. So, yeah, it went really well.
You need to finger her with the Spock hand sign since she loves Star Trek.
I still have to bake cookies and shave my legs so Mike can have MILF & cookies when he gets home.
He said watch this and then went and tripped into a group of 40 year old women, now he's leaving the club with them.
Randomize
