First, he can't make me cum.. And now, he can't get it up because he LOVES me?!!??! i don't think so.
life lesson #1: a fart during an awkward silence between 2 strangers doesnt make it less awkward.
Ok lesson learned. Don't lick the spoon when making mushroom chocolates. The kitchen walls are melting.
In class ... We were just assigned groups for the quarter... Remember that night we took shots from that guys pants? I now know his name
I saw you eating fruit and doing shots off people passed out
When he pulls out of you and farts and says ahh I wanted to do that for the past 30 mins ....you rethink the next drunken hook up
I think I'm gonna quit partying for awhile. Piercing my own nose is where I draw the line.
This Halloween will be different. I'm just here to get shitfaced, not troll around looking for slutty nun pussy.
I'm a sociology major remember
Well that and comm
Basically you majored in how to get laid
I don't want random pictures of your morning wood. It's like, what a glorious morning oh a penis.
jusy threw up in the airport bathroom. I am no longer thankful for fireball.
If I could drink as much and have the amount of sex he has at his age, well I'd probably be dead
I started keeping track of my period when I realized you had a better grasp of it than me.
Congratulations! We have a period
No my problem is I'm working and its a beautiful Saturday. I should be recovering from a hangover and out golfing. Fuck responsibility. I miss college.
Randomize