you were calling yourself Ulickes S. Cunt.
I'm on page 4.
Im on beer infinity
I just met the 30 percent of the population with an STD
They pulled him over whille he had a fish tank full of beer in his front seat. He told them it coudn't count as an open container cause the top was on it.
I hate the hobo that sits outside our building
Joe or Chris?
do i even wanna kno y u kno their names?
well i came home drunk one night and Chris offered me a beer as i was coming in, it was kinda weird but i wasn't goin to deny a free beer. you're proolly talkin about Joe though, he's the one with the fucked up eye.
I mean he's a cool ass guy, but he's genuinely in love with a fat chick. I just can't take him seriously as a person.
Hypothetical question: how bad would bacardi be as an IV drip?
death...100% death...what r u planning.
Come in your red robin gear. If you smell like French fries we can make love.
The thought "Ummm which pants am I wearing? ...I *am* wearing pants, right?" just ran through my head. I'm done. So done.
No one understands the complete and utter debilitating 3 day bday bender.
You should just skip the small talk from now on and instead say something like "You need to come slay the dragon, be here in 15?"
The stall at this bar had mirrors all around. I just looked at myself take a shit from like 3 different angles
Shut up. I hate you. We're doing shots tomorrow. Fuck the consequences.
Who told you he won a fight? He slammed his face into the ground while trying to do 11 push-ups
Because, after all, nothing quite says life in 2020 than doing laundry at 9:40 on a Friday morning to make sure you have masks and underwear.
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