To answer your question of whether I "went back," tits just informed me I was kicked out for falling off my barstool and passing out on the floor...
she then came into the room and yelled I'M GOING TO BE A COCK BLOCK for 5 minutes
mom just called and i was mid bong hit but i answered anyways coughing and sounding rough she the apologized for waking her little angel up. its 2PM
I was talking to this girl who was in love with the air force. I was doing decently until I mentioned that the navy actually has more planes. Cockblocked by my knowledge of random trivia again.
My little brother just suggested we drink the rest of the vodka because it's raining. My job is complete.
It's like a party bus, but there's a glass, airtight wall separating the driver from the passengers, and once everyone's on, they pump vaporized THC into the cabin.
Some kids in a school bus just saw me jacking off in my car. This is how 89% of children find out about sex.
Trying to figure out if the guy I'm with right now is the same guy I met spring break
Oh duude it is the guy from spring break! Awk.
We helped him hit the bowl to the point that he didn't even have to move
I just need some breakup sex yanno like filthy wish fulfilling breakup sex to make me forget what I never had
3 cups of coffee and some molly. The "Tay's Day Off Diet"
She passed out in my baby sister's room so we put her in one of my grandma's diapers, put a pacifier in her mouth, put her in my sister's crib and took pictures.
Just got a handjob in my psych lecture. You were right, going to class is paying off.
Dude I can't beleive you didn't wake up. I literally f'd her IN THE DISHWASHER. Btw I'm pretty sure I also kinda broke the dishwasher.
im pretty sure i tried to use axe body spray to cover up the strong urine smell coming from my jeans. im also pretty sure that it didnt work.
Randomize
