Your mouth is God's brothel.
I want to do you till i cant cum anymore. Till all i get is a little flag that says "bang".
I got "discovered a new religion high" last night
You just got cockblocked by Conan O'Brien.
apparently breaking a beer bottle and then throwing up in a urinal is a terrible way to pick up girls.
I hope this doesn't become one of those friendships where we dont have sex
making an indian outfit so we can be pochohantas and john smith and fuck in the canoe on the night float
lets just use each other and get past this awkward stage. forget my name.
You are COMPLAINING that the sex was too good. You're not getting any sympathy from me
He said I act like a cross between a kindergartener and a high 70 year old man. Which is inacurate because it fails to account for the disco obsession.
Hey my vagina is like a company. Everyone has an equal opportunity....
you fail at everything in life besides blacking out
You dropped my mother on the dance floor. She has a concussion. You didn't apologize. Don't speak to me for a while.
It's almost like he's actually taking my commentary and criticism to heart, but simultaneously succumbing to some primal urge to wear less clothing each time.
dude, he literally lasted one minute. and i paid 8 dollars for cabs.
Randomize
