Clearly, I'm already going to hell, so there's no point in trying anymore.
What hospital were we in last night? Insurance needs to know
Mom just Facebook checked into an Applebees at 2am. Caption: ''WITH THE BESTIEZ.''
Def regretting not writing "will blow for extra credit" on my last final
Im in Ft Meyers right now looking right at an alligator. I have had a couple of beers and people are telling me not to feed him but Im gonna do it anyway.
Can an epipen be used as a tranquilizer ?
I heard him say "bet you won't", look over 10 seconds later and she's blowing him.....looked eloquent under the glow of a camp fire.
Just made a jeopardy bj game. Every question has 10-50 seconds on it and if he's right that's how many he gets.
My mom just covered me while I peed in the street. I love her. i also love parents weekend.
We need to talk about the sailor moon porn. Do what you want in your room, but I don't want to come home to you cranking it on the couch to that.
Dude of course I want to. Your penis is beautiful.
We were like one big happy Eskimo family.
the guy in front of me in walmart is buying a blowtorch, potato chips, and condoms. I'm curious and horrified at the same time.
welp, we watched the human centipede high last night and my mind literally shut down, when i came to all i could hear was mel saying EAT EAT HIS SHIT
Of course he’s dumb. He’s got a 9 inch dick! There’s not enough blood in his body for a big dick and a big brain. It’s science
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