Is it wrong to scream your own name when about to bust?
Apparently I masturbate in my sleep now.
His dick was so small it sat perched on top of his balls like it was king of his scrotum.
yes we were fucking thats why i put "watching a movie" in quotations
do people in england often walk their sheep on leashes? or is this guy the exception to the rule?
Oh god I can't handle any more dudes. I just walk of shamed to work wearing a guy's boxers and a life jacket. This summer is going to kill me.
U should just post that picture of u two on facebook with the caption, does anyone know this girl? If so please tell her to take plan b, thanks
I think I just ate eggs off of a plate covered in cocaine.
And I feel like pitchers of margaritas accidentally make it down your throat a lot.
I mean, the lady at the Mexican restaurant insisted. She said she would win a prize if she sold another pitcher before noon. And plus I got to wear a sombrero
Taco Bell. She just parked, got out of the car mid drive-thru, ran to the dumpsters, pissed, then ran back and drove up in the line.
I told the cop to try walking in heels and he'd understand why I was walking home without then on. He told me he only does that on Wednesdays.
Bro, I just googled 36 year old pussy so when I do see it I won't be shocked.
I just got breakfast in bed and he went down on me. And you though he was a bad idea. Shame
To the point, I hope I remember where to put my dick when I finally get laid again
You have a 50 50 chance
Take off your clothes and see if he wants to have sex, that's a good way to find out
Randomize
