How did you manage that?
Told her it wasn't GENITAL herpes... just ORAL herpes... on my penis
lol... jersey girls rock
why is it that everyone in pennsylvannia gets fucking prego??
my little sister told my dad she found willy wonka's golden ticket in the backseat of my car. now my dad knows my boyfriend uses magnums.
I don't care if the man pisses on teenage girls, he's enchanting.
that was probably me. ive bitten a lot of people.
He burnt a smiley face into the screen with a cigarette, peed in my tub and then tried to take off his pants. tried...
Went to anytime fitness at 3:34 am drunk after the the bar and getting whataburger. Lifted weights with my cheeseburger between my knees. That's called DEDICATION.
Dude. 21 days till I'm 21. It's the 21 day countdown. The 25 days of Christmas can suck my dick.
Just read 119 best sex positions. I wanna try 107 of them. Can I put you down for 50?
Idk what the interview would be like but I imagine you in a suit and tie surveying a nervous freshman and eventually leading him into a labyrinth of debauchery and clapping him on the back, saying "welcome to the fraternity, son"
I think you just described to us the most perfect drunken fairy tale that has somehow never been written
You told your family you're bi over the phone?!
We were talking about exes and it just came out....and so did I.
I'm not sure of this happened or if it was just a dream... But I vividly remember you walking down the street naked?
No actually I had socks on...
all I remember is them saying he had a big dick and the next thing I know I’m leaving with him
I have a dinner date combo blowjob event with Tristan tonight.
Randomize
